I'm pretty devastated. I have secretly been in this
relationship...well, an affair based on, um, finances you could say.
I've been seeing someone for many years and now it's over...as I know
it. It's all because of this stupid economy. Money causes so many
problems in relationships. We all know that. Anyway, I'd been seeing
this guy for several years. I never got to go to his place. He'd always
come to me, so... Anyway, every time I'd hear him pulling up to my apt
building I would run to greet him at my door, sometimes from the balcony, with great anticipation.
We saw each other almost everyday for weeks, months on end. We both
relocated from foreign lands - he's from Mexico and I'm from Ohio - so
holidays were when we needed and saw each other the most...and then we'd
take a break. We never lost touch, though. Sometimes we spent more time
in each others' company than others. But a couple of years ago it kind
of cooled off. I had lost my job. We still saw one another on occasion and he was always so
sweet and giving, but sometimes he'd act like he didn't have anything
for me anymore. Well, today I saw him. I approached him and told him
that I didn't like not seeing him the way I used to and he blamed me.
And then he informed me he's back with his wife and they just found out
she's expecting. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? AND THEY PLANNED IT! What could I
say?
I wanted to explain to him that it's not my fault that the economy took
the turn it did and kept me from shopping online as much as I used to
do. What I wouldn't give to go on Dooney & Bourkes clearance, or QVC
and HSN online and just GO CRAZY...but I can't afford to do that
anymore. So he has no reason to come see me anymore. The UPS man.
Joaquin, I miss you. I hope before I leave this apartment you and I can
rekindle what we once had.
ANGEL
2 hearts that see as one
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Thursday, October 11, 2012
99 Problems But Dick Ain't One
Dear Dick,
You have been trying to find your way back into my life again recently and I am just not on you right now. It's not a bad thing nor a good thing, it's just my thing and I'm gon' do what I want to do. You can't tell me who to sock it to. You don't dick-tate anything around here.
I have money problems from being out of regular work for too long. I have emotional problems from being alone for too long. Being away from you - not a big problem. Sometimes you come with big problems. (And the more plentiful you are, sometimes the bigger you are, the worse. More Dick, more problems.) You want too much too soon, you need too much too soon, but you're rarely able to give as much or only able to give under certain conditions - conditions different for me and Vag'. A snake can still slither in the desert but dry is a not desirable condition for us warm blooded, bipedal primates. It is much better when the atmosphere is dripping and jumping with excitement. I haven't come into personal contact with anyone of you who can maintain the proper communication, show the consistent attention, display the right amount of generosity on all levels or all-around growth to help bring about those conditions for me. Until you do I'll continue to share my bed and fill my life with other things, and not be a whore-der trying to be close to or find the right one of you.
If you aren't part of my solution, you're not going to be my problem. I got ninety-nine problems, but Dick, you won't be one.
Love (still),
Me
You have been trying to find your way back into my life again recently and I am just not on you right now. It's not a bad thing nor a good thing, it's just my thing and I'm gon' do what I want to do. You can't tell me who to sock it to. You don't dick-tate anything around here.
I have money problems from being out of regular work for too long. I have emotional problems from being alone for too long. Being away from you - not a big problem. Sometimes you come with big problems. (And the more plentiful you are, sometimes the bigger you are, the worse. More Dick, more problems.) You want too much too soon, you need too much too soon, but you're rarely able to give as much or only able to give under certain conditions - conditions different for me and Vag'. A snake can still slither in the desert but dry is a not desirable condition for us warm blooded, bipedal primates. It is much better when the atmosphere is dripping and jumping with excitement. I haven't come into personal contact with anyone of you who can maintain the proper communication, show the consistent attention, display the right amount of generosity on all levels or all-around growth to help bring about those conditions for me. Until you do I'll continue to share my bed and fill my life with other things, and not be a whore-der trying to be close to or find the right one of you.
If you aren't part of my solution, you're not going to be my problem. I got ninety-nine problems, but Dick, you won't be one.
Love (still),
Me
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
PAYING THE COST
Dear Dick,
I've been away from you for a while now in more ways than one. I still haven't spent time with you in a toddler's age, and I haven't even made the time to write to you. I actually just let you slip from my mind for a while. It was really refreshing - and then I got a call. (exhale)
As bold as I can be I am much too afraid to bare my soul to you over the phone. In any case, baring one's soul may not be easy. It is costly, but it is freeing. I have just finished sending one of you a personal note that puts it so far out there, I no longer bear the responsibility of what happens next. I'd much rather pay the cost of sharing my thoughts than risk the debt of not.
It is possible that you stand the risk of losing more - that darned interest - when you hold things back than what you could lose by giving everything up. You give what you have or stand the chance of owing more by not giving anything.
To the tune of Janet Jackson, I Miss You Much, but it's about way more than just the Pleasure Principal over here, babe.
In the words of Brian McKnight, when the eagles forget how to fly and it's twenty below in July, and when violets turn red and roses turn blue, I'll be Still In Love with you.
Love always,
Me
I've been away from you for a while now in more ways than one. I still haven't spent time with you in a toddler's age, and I haven't even made the time to write to you. I actually just let you slip from my mind for a while. It was really refreshing - and then I got a call. (exhale)
As bold as I can be I am much too afraid to bare my soul to you over the phone. In any case, baring one's soul may not be easy. It is costly, but it is freeing. I have just finished sending one of you a personal note that puts it so far out there, I no longer bear the responsibility of what happens next. I'd much rather pay the cost of sharing my thoughts than risk the debt of not.
It is possible that you stand the risk of losing more - that darned interest - when you hold things back than what you could lose by giving everything up. You give what you have or stand the chance of owing more by not giving anything.
To the tune of Janet Jackson, I Miss You Much, but it's about way more than just the Pleasure Principal over here, babe.
In the words of Brian McKnight, when the eagles forget how to fly and it's twenty below in July, and when violets turn red and roses turn blue, I'll be Still In Love with you.
Love always,
Me
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