If You Don't Fit, Don't Force It

Dear Dick,

Hey there, how's it hanging? I'm trying to be like LeVert, just cooling, but it's pretty hot and sticky here, but no sweat. I wish there were something you could do to help but I'm just going to relax and let it go. Let me give it to you straight from the hip: you still have a lot of growing to do. I'm sure you have your own opinions on the matter and probably feel I could tighten up some myself, but believe I'm tight where I need to be, and the places that could use it, the right Dick will me help me lose it. I'm just sayin'. I'm tight, but not rigid. I can stretch for the person who's done and is doing the right amount of growing. I'm not knocking where you are because I don't know where you've been, but I can only give you so much wiggle room to get there, so you just can't do it here. I'm not going to say I'm sorry, and nor do I apologize for not being the right fit for so many of you.
Timing is everything. I'm going to give you a little more away from me for now.

Love,

Me